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The state I'm in

Here are 13 things I love and hate about South Dakota.

1. LOVE. No traffic.
2. HATE. The number of Barnes & Noble stores in SD. (#2 is a teeny tiny B. Dalton in a teeny tiny pseudo mall. Does not count.)
3. LOVE. Wide open spaces.
4. HATE. Drunk drivers. WASHINGTON - The upper Midwest has the worst drunken driving rates in the country, according to a government report that says 15 percent of adult drivers nationally report driving under the influence of alcohol in the previous year. Wisconsin leads the way. The federal government estimates more than a quarter of the state's adult drivers had driven under the influence. Rounding out the worst five are North Dakota, Minnesota, Nebraska and South Dakota.
5. LOVE. Low Crime
   2005 Crime Rate for South Dakota

   The crime rate in South Dakota is about 48% lower than the national average rate. Property crimes account for around 91% of the crime rate in South Dakota which is 47% lower than the national rate. The remaining 4.7% are violent crimes and are about 56% lower than other states. The following graph shows how South Dakota compared to the rest of the states.

   State Crime Rates (Per 100,000 People)

   (Place your mouse over a bar for details, or click on a bar to view that state's profile.)

   	South Dakota	National Avg.
   Crime Rates (2005)	1,952	3,751
   Violent Crimes	176	401
   Property Crimes	1,776	3,350

6. HATE. Unbelievably stupid weather. Note the 40 degree change in a few days.

   

7. LOVE. The Black Hills.

   

8. HATE. Low wages.

   All Occupations top
   			Wage Estimates
   Occupation Code	Occupation Title	Employment (1)	Median Hourly	Mean Hourly	Mean Annual (2)	Mean RSE (3)
   00-0000	All Occupations	381,230	$11.96	$14.65	$30,460	0.4 %

9. LOVE. Lots of opportunities.

   State unemployment, January 2008

   «click column headings to re-sort table»

   Rank ▲	State	Rate
   1	SOUTH DAKOTA	2.6
   2	WYOMING	2.7
   3	IDAHO	2.8
   4	NEBRASKA	2.9
   5	UTAH	3.0
   6	HAWAII	3.1
   6	NEW MEXICO	3.1
   8	NORTH DAKOTA	3.2
   8	MONTANA	3.2
   10	VIRGINIA	3.4

10. HATE. Pheasants.
    
11. LOVE. Not a lot of people.
    View population trends...

    	2007	2000	1990
    Population	796,214	754,844	696,004

    Source: U.S. Census Bureau, 2007 Population Estimates, Census 2000, 1990 Census
12. HATE. Not a lot of people.
    View population trends...

    	2007	2000	1990
    Population	796,214	754,844	696,004

    Source: U.S. Census Bureau, 2007 Population Estimates, Census 2000, 1990 Census
13. LOVE. Most of my family lives here.

1. 
   
   
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A bit of bio

I recently shared this story with a close friend. I call it, "How I Spent My Summer Vacations, OR, What It Means To Me To Be Indian."

I went most of my young life never really giving any thought to being Indian. It didn't really mean anything to me. I knew my mom worked for the BIA and I knew that I was Indian, but it didn't really have any context. We would go to SD for visits and everyone was brown. No big deal. (As an aside, I remember being a little girl and learning about WWII and the Holocaust. I couldn't understand why people didn't like Jewish people. They were white (to my eyes). Didn't everyone like white people? Obviously I missed something there.)

This all really changed when we moved to Rapid City, SD in 1983. I very quickly learned that Indians were not viewed well by white people. My entire schooling in Rapid City - from 6th grade to 12th - I only went to school with maybe 6 black kids. And they were the coolest kids in the school. It was the Indian kids that were completely looked down on and treated like dirt. A cousin of mine once told me that her experience growing up in NYC was totally different - people thought it was exotic and interesting that she was Native. This was SO not true in this state.

I became ashamed of being Indian. All my friends and teachers and everyone I knew (outside of family) had horrible things to say about Indians. I didn't want to be associated with that group of people at all. I never told anyone that I was Indian. When people would ask about my name, I'd just tell them that it was a family name and I didn't know anything about it. I remember being grateful that I didn't "look" Indian like my mom and others in our family - this is not something easy to admit at all. I look now and see all the beautiful women in my family and would give anything for their gorgeous hair, eyes, and skin.

So that was kind of my life for a few years. I was a "white" kid. Looking white like I do has allowed me to hear some really terrible stuff over the years. No one talks smack about brown people in front of people who look obviously ethnic. But if you can "pass" then you get to hear alllll the dirt. It led to kind of a schizo existence. We would spend the school year in Rapid City and I had all these nice white, suburban friends. But then my summers would be spent at the River and I was a rez girl running around with her cousins and swimming every day.

All of this kind of came to a head my junior year of high school. I had this creative writing class with this total hippie teacher. She was one of those that had the whole class sit in a circle. We watched weird documentaries about Thalidomide babies so that we would have deep meaningful things to write about. She was kind of a nut really. I can't even remember her name beyond "Sue" because we weren't allowed to call her Mrs. Whatever. Weird.

One day we were all sitting in a circle and the teacher asked if any of us knew anything about the Wounded Knee massacre. I raised my hand and so did this other kid. I was kind of sitting off the the side of the teacher and so she didn't see me. She asked the other guy what he thought about it. And the dude just went off on this big long vitriolic rant against Indians. It was just unbelievable. I've hardly ever heard such hateful speech. It was like being in apartheid South Africa or the deep south. One thing he said was that Indians can commit almost any crime and get away with it.

I finally had enough and jumped in. At that point in time, my uncle was chairman of our tribe and he hired my mom to be a temporary public defender until he could get someone hired permanently. I asked him if he knew ANYTHING about how crimes are handled on a reservation. The difference between white on white crime or white on Indian or Indian on Indian or whatever. He countered with the fact that his dad was a dentist and was always having to fix the teeth of Indians who beat the crap out of each other. What a tool. I told him that maybe the inane attitudes that come from people like him and his dad contributed to that and I hope his dad was happy that his son's ignorance was drumming up more business for him. This thing went back and forth I don't know how long. And basically I just dismantled every stupid thing he had to say. I effectively reduced him publicly to an ignorant hateful bigot. He finally just got pissed off and said, "Why do you care about a bunch of filthy Indians anyway." So I answered him with, "Because I AM ONE you stupid ************." And then I left the classroom. An Asian girl got up and left too. The teacher later apologized (which I felt was unnecessary) and said that she would talk to him. I didn't really care about that. He was an idiot and I wasn't. End of story.

That day was the last of my shame about where I came from. It's not like I'm little miss Lakota trotting out my heritage at every given moment. But when I'm asked, I tell the truth. If I hear someone say something really ignorant about Indians or blacks or Jewish people or whatever, I pipe up. I'm just not going to stand for people spouting idiocy in my presence. Are there problems with Indian people? Absolutely. Lots of them. But I'm not going to listen to anyone speak from a position of ignorance. (This also includes not listening Native people start on their anti-white crap either.) I am also not going to hide who I am anymore. I don't "define" myself as Indian. It's PART of who I am. Just like part of who I am is Irish or female or short or whatever.

South Dakota is a different place now. I was worried about what Dylan would run into when we moved back here. But it seems like some of these problems have relaxed - especially with his generation. Certainly there are still a lot of bigots, but the overt, systemic racist crap has gone away to a large degree (I'm sure every relative I have would argue with me about that until the end of the world...but I think it's true. On the other hand, no one follows me around in stores to make sure I don't steal stuff. So what do I know?). I'm glad about that. It was a hard way to grow up and I'm glad he doesn't have to go through doubting himself and his background. Maybe my difficulties have made me a better, stronger person....or whatever. But no one wants their kids to experience difficulties if they can be avoided.

Art

Here are 13 paintings that I love.

1. Edward Hopper, Nighthawks
2. Diego Velazquez, The Waterseller of Seville (Please click on this for the larger version and look at the water on the side of the jug - amazing.)
3. Edward Hopper, Lighthouse at Two Lights
4. Johannes Vermeer, Woman Reading a Letter
5. Johannes Vermeer, The Guitar Player
6. Leonardo da Vinci, Female Head
7. Vincent Van Gogh, Almond Blossom
8. Vincent Van Gogh, Starry Night
9. Mary Cassat, Breakfast in Bed
10. Andrew Wyeth, Master Bedroom
11. Claude Monet, Water Lilies
12. Sandro Botticelli, Primavera
13. Ok I'm cheating. This is a sculpture. Michaelangelo, Pieta.

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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

What's the big deal?

This seems like perfectly reasonable behavior to me. If I didn't have opposable thumbs, I'd be doing the exact same thing. It's CAKE dude!!! CAKE!

It's all about the sauce

Here's the story. My mom first had this dish at Avanti's restaurant in Phoenix, Arizona. She absolutely loved it and would make people take her there whenever she could manage it. One day, much to my mom's joy, the recipe was printed in the Phoenix paper. She says she tried twice to make the dish (as written) and it just never turned out the same - even with the addition of some white wine.

Fast foward about 30 years to Christmas 2007. For some really long, complicated, and not too interesting reasons my mom just happened to have four key ingredients sitting around as surplus from all the Christmas food preparations - portobella mushrooms, walnuts, Parmesan, and cheese ravioli. She was trying to figure out what to make for dinner and remembered the recipe from Avanti's. She decided that third time is a charm and gave it a shot. Well hallelujah it's a Christmas miracle. This sauce ROCKS. It's brilliant on cheese ravioli with Italian sausage and I even made it to put on steaks - also phenomenal. This is the easiest thing to make in the world and it tastes amazing.

Sauce Portofino (Avanti's Restaurant - Phoenix, AZ)

1/4 lb butter
1/2 cup heavy cream
1 cup freshly grated imported Parmesan cheese (We've done 1/2 Parmesan and 1/2 Romano. The important thing is that you use really good quality cheese.)
1/4 lb fresh portobella (or cremini) mushrooms, sliced and sauteed until slightly soft (This is vital - the 2 times she tried to make it before, she used regular white button mushrooms and it was not the same. You must use portobellas or creminis.)
2 ounces walnuts, chopped
1/4 cup dry white wine
salt and freshly ground pepper to taste

Melt butter slowly in saute pan. Add cream, cheese, walntus and slightly softened mushrooms. Season. Stir until all the butter is melted and the cream and cheese have combined into a golden creamy mixture. Add wine and heat until warm enough to serve. (DO NOT BOIL).

Serve over cheese ravioli, your favorite pasta, steak, or anything to keep you from embarrassing yourself by just eating this straight out of the pan. :)

Joke

Q: Why did the sloth cross the road?



A: Who can remember anymore??!!?!

13 x 13

I think this is my 13th Thursday Thirteen. It's either that or I was typically lazy about my post labeling and this is just the 13th one that has a lable on it. Whatevs dude. 13 x 13 makes a cool post title so I'll justify it any way I can. A couple weeks ago I posted 13 possible TT topics. Yeah I'm not going to use any of those because they seem like too much work and it's late and I don't want to do it. Next week I'll do the favorite paintings - I just don't want to look them all up right now. Someone was recently telling me that they want to know more about me. So here are 13 random things about me - some of these you all have seen before, but some will be new.

1. I am terrified of storms - specifically, tornados. I'm sure this is all related to my control-freak tendencies, but I just hate storms. I deal with them just fine, but I will never ever like them.
2. I just got a promotion and a raise because I rock. ;)
3. I'm a cat person. I've had dogs, but I could go the rest of my life without having another one. A dog is too much work...it's like having a kid that never grows up. (Cringing at what my other self, Julie, is going to have to say about this one.) A cat is more like a plant that moves around. Although I kill plants. But I have managed to keep two cats alive for 10 years.
4. I am a complete pop culture junkie. I love it. I'll read trash magazines, watch I Love the Whatever Decade on VH1, read Perez Hilton, you name it. Not the loftiest of pursuits, I admit it. But is does make for some mildly amusing escapism.
5. I bite my nails. I have done since I was a tiny girl. I've used that bitter nail polish to quit any number of times, but I always go back to it. Years ago, back when I still smoked, it really offended this lady that I worked with. She said I could either smoke OR chew my nails, but not both. She said that was way too much oral fixation. So I tore the eraser off her pencil with my teeth.
   
6. I feel like I should be collecting something. Like it will make me a real grown up to have a collection of Hummels or dolphin figurines or stamps from around the world or cobalt glassware or something. But I don't do it. I guess I collect books and movies. I have about 1,000 books and two big binders full of movies. Does that count?
7. I think I'm kind of crappy driver. We can't all be good, right? It's not that I'm a BAD driver, but I'm a timid driver. I hate traveling on interstate highways. And people hate to be behind me because I drive slow. A semi passing me makes me want to cry. Again - control freak. I trust myself completely, it's all those other idiots that make me nervous. I really don't like to drive fast or ride in a car that's being driven fast. I have nowhere to be that is that dang important. I'm not transporting life saving organs, I'm not getting the message to the troops that the British are coming, and only one time in my life did I have a laboring pregnant woman in my car.
8. One time I had a laboring pregnant woman in my car. I blogged about this before I think. I was 16 and my 19 year old cousin was overdue. So the genius powers that be in our family decided that they would send her off with me on a road trip through barren, empty, western South Dakota to see a specialist. Why not? How perfect!! Who better than to handle a complication than 16 year old me??? We got about an hour and half down the road when it all went to hell. Little did we know that a first baby would take DAYS to come. I don't even like to think of the traffic laws I violated, chewed up, spit out, and left in my blazing wake. The whole way back she kept apologizing to me because she was just certain her water was going to break on my car seats. I believe I responded with, "Shut up!!! Just breathe or something. DON'T PUSH!!" or something equally wise and helpful. This was almost 19 years ago. Happy Bday Ash! (Thanks for waiting until we got to the hospital.)
   
9. I have issues with food textures. I love the flavor that mushrooms give to things and use them in tons of things that I make. But I have to mince them up and they have to be cooked. I would never ever bite into a fresh mushroom. I also can't stand raw tomatoes. I love tomato soup, tomatoes in soup, etc. But I will pick fresh tomato off my hamburger or taco or whatever. Carrots are the opposite. I really do not like the texture of cooked carrots, but I will eat raw carrots all day long. I know this is weird.
10. I can't sew at all. I'll make clumsy attempts at buttons, but they always look a little weird and even though I know deep down inside that I don't need to use the whole spool of thread, I just can't seem to stop myself. I tried to teach myself how to knit, but...ummm...no, that didn't work and I can't believe I didn't lose an eye.
11. I never wear any jewelry and don't know the first thing about accessorizing. I completely admire women who can do this, but I am not one of them. Most of my clothes are black or other dark solid colors so they all kind of match and are maybe vaguely slimming (so I've heard). I'm sure there are all sorts of other things I would look really cute in, but I don't even know where to begin with it. And mostly, I'm ok with this. At the very least, I look presentable if not fashionable.
    
12. I really hate cartoons. I blame this solely on Dylan and Disney. They kept churning out those movies and he kept watching them obsessively over and over and over and over again. Sure I've seen some cute or funny or witty things. Charlie the Unicorn comes to mind. But if I never see another animated thing again in my entire life, I will be completely ok with that.
    
13. I can wiggle my ears.

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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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Not for the queasy

What's going on my blogger friends? It seems like all of my blog friends have been dealing with really terrible instances of body fluids gone awry. Here is my contribution to the grossness.

I just got done cleaning up Noah. He managed to cover himself in poo. I'm on the phone with my friend Kathleen and I hear from the bathroom: "Mommy, I need you." I go in there and he's got poo all over his hands, poo all over the toilet seat, the rug, the entire back of his butt and legs. And somehow, I can't even BEGIN to imagine how this happened - he's got a marble size piece of poo sitting on his right shoulder. I say to Kathy, "Oh my god he's covered in s&^! I have to go." I can hear her cracking up as I close the phone. I manage to get him undressed (covering ME in poo in the process) and put him in the tub. Dear Jesus God. I'm spraying him off and washing him and oh wow it just stinks so bad. I finally get him cleaned off and out of the tub (of course we're having to avoid the poo-bombed rug during this process).

I finally sat him down and looked at him and said, "Please explain to me what happened."
(What happened to your MANNERS kid???!!!)

This is what I get, "I was just trying to wipe my butt."

LOL LOL LOL

If trying to wipe your butt results in you having a piece of poo sitting on your shoulder....dude....your doin' it wrong.

And the complete icing on the cake is just as I get done with this literal s&^!storm....Jeff walks in the door.

He obviously doesn't get it from me....

Adorable big-eyed kid walks up, "Mommy, may I please go use the potty?"

Mommy looks at alien child askance, "Uh...sure dude. But you don't have to ask mommy to use the potty."

Bratty kid gives mommy a look of utter disdain and pity, "Mo-om, I'm using my MANNERS!!"

Wretched, ill-mannered mommy shoots dirty look at snotty rat child as he heads towards bathroom while muttering expletives and "I'll show you manners" under her breath.

*sigh*

There goes my Mother of the Year nomination again. 17 straight years I've managed to miss out.

Meet my friends

I really want to say thank you again to all the people who were concerned about my little leave of absence. I know that if some of you stopped blogging for days on end, I would be really concerned too. Funny isn't it? We've made these connections across time and geography and it is very real. I suppose we could all be making stuff up about ourselves and none of this is meaningful. But I don't think that's the case. I think you all are a bunch of really amazing and interesting people. I love reading about your lives. So many of you are so funny, so intelligent, so caring - you've made my world a more interesting place.

I'd like to send out some personal thanks to these fine people:

Sandy - Momisodes
K. - She's in Transition
Kat - Kat's Meow
Linda - Life Rushes By
Julie - Causes Rats in Lab Cancer
Maggie - Maggie's Mind

If you ever want to read about some extraordinary lives, go check one of them out.

Back....by popular demand...or...other

Ok gang. With little fanfare or explanation, let me just say sorry to anyone I worried and thank you for your concern - that was actually really touching. It's all good - nothing bad happened....I just....took a holiday. Or did I? Here are 13 things that maybe I was doing all this time. Can you pick out the truth?

1. The UN called and wanted me to help them out with a world crisis and if I tell you any more about it....I'll have to kill you.
2. The Culinary Institute of France has been reading all my recipes and flew me to Paris to teach a class to all their witless professors because I haz some mad food skillz.
3. I'm in the middle of a torrid love affair and was off gettin' busy.
4. Uhhh....I got kind of bored with it all.
5. During the middle of Easter dinner I had an epiphany and figured out how to convert kitchen scraps into gasoline in one easy and non-smelly step....so I was meeting with Al Gore to discuss how to save the environment with my new invention.
6. I started smoking again and went on a week and half long cigarette bender and then had to check into a clinic to detox.
7. George Clooney finally pulled his beautiful head out of his butt and realized how much he actually does love me and we were off in Vegas hanging out with Brad and Angie.
8. I went through 10 days of brain freeze and just couldn't think of a damn thing to say.
9. I was heroically saving only the cutest of kids and cuddliest of kittehs from some sort of burning structure and after my injuries healed I had to go to the White House for the medal ceremony.
10. South Dakota is pretty rural...and....it snowed...and....we had no power...yeah...the whole state...yup...just candles...right.
    
11. There was a holiday, work, kids, life, trip out of town, etc.
12. I won the lottery and after recovering from the small heart attack, I've been on a crazed shopping marathon and am now working on plans to build a house and garage to hold all the crap that I bought.
13. Aliens dude. Aliens.

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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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